Monday, March 21, 2005

"Its only metal?"

Okay, I have a completely nutty story to relate this morning. And as stories go its not so amazing or anything... Its more about what there person said to me, I was incredulous.

So I take my family out to a local Mexican restaurant, we'll call it El Cramp-esino, to protect the innocent. Now, the food is average, but you can't beat the prices. I mean I can get a sit down dinner in a restaurant for 6 bux! So, its a no brainer when you don't want to eat at home, but you don't have a ton of cash.

I am enjoying a particularly large beef burrito and shooting the breeze with some friends when I detect something is amiss. You know the feeling, you are chewing away, and then... whoa, what was that? Your tongue starts the exploration mission. Slowing trolling the interior of your mouth seeking out this foreign object. You can't find it at first, so you continue chewing, but more cautiously this time... crunch... There it is again! Its not quite bone, but you know its not FOOD! What in the world is it. The tongue continues its patrol. (By the way while all of this is going on, you usually keep acting like nothing is happening. You don't want to needlessly gross out your dining companions, until we are aware of the identity of the intruder..)

Click - there it is... I carefully wrangle the object to the front of your mouth, all the while my brain is going crazy trying to determine its origin. Carefully I turn aside from my dining companions to hide the fact that something that I was dining on is now making a grand re-appearance at the table.

I pull out this thing to examine it, and what do I find? Its a metal twist tie! With of course some of the decorative red paper still hanging on all gross and mixed with pintos. SICK! Now my stomach starts to turn. (Of course, I know that its an irrational response, as a twist tie in itself is not so gross, but you start to wonder what ELSE is in your food.) My friends are now equally grossed out and demand that I bring this to the attention to my server. I call her over and show her what I have discovered in #8. The Burrito Especial, and this is where we are all blown away.... She replies with some disdain. "Ees only metal"...


What kind of reaction is that? I expected an "I am sorry", or "please forgive us"... But no! Ees only metal!!! As if to say, "what a wimp! People usually only complain when they find a body part" Ees only metal, means to me that much worse is USUALLY found in the Burrito Especial. Like I should be happy it was only metal. Aye! This may be my last visit to the Crampesino for some time. I don't think I am ready to engage in the mystery food lottery any time soon. Especially considering that I apparently was a winner this time around. Who knows what I may find on my next visit...?

"Ees only a mouse"
"Ees only a leetle rat"
"Ees only used chewing gum"
"Ees only a leetle beet of finger"

Okay, I am done now. And I am not hungry again....


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